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A summary of Unpaid care discussion from history intersecting with gender, starts with the understanding that nurture, through reproduction, is assigned to women through the act of conception and pregnancy process all through to delivery. Women carry this on with the normalised responsibility of ‘motherhood’. While mothering is relative, society sets a generalised standard and expectations that women should also have, irrespective of their lived experiences . Many women that decide to nurture, do not have similar or same experience with another woman. Desire to have children, motherhood, conception process and eventual birthing, is an individualised concept that society has to accept is not ‘fit for all’.
Unpaid care is influenced by Gender norms and roles, which then determines which body plays what role in the nurture ecosystem. While the woman shows the materialisation of conception, the man play an important role in the entire process. Social norms creates a situation that the woman continues to nurture even though she’s not the only contributor to the conception. Men, through performing masculinity, are socialised to provide and protect, and many find their roles more external, than within the nurturing ecosystem of the offspring.
Domestication becomes a very strong requirement for women which is largely assigned by an anonymous group watching and policing to either shame or reward based on the conceptualised gender characteristics of ‘caring’. One of the impact of domestication on women is the unfair disadvantage it places on women who decide to take the nurture route and sacrifice time for their care responsibilities. It would be a better situation if women have all the right information and resources to make all informed decisions for themselves and also have very strong systems of support no matter what that decision is. Social norms in our society rarely afford women the opportunity to consider and re-consider options and decisions. Men have the advanced advantage and an added advantage in options and decisions way more based on expectations and norms that are also gendered and institutionalised. Many women would benefit from having ‘equal’ playing field when society reduces policing and stratification over women, their bodes and decisions towards nurture and care.
Maternity and paternity is influenced by the norms of gender roles. Women who decide to become nurturers, access leave which can be paid in full for the entire duration, part-paid or some loose their positions in an organisation or remain on same level before nurture and post-nurture, if they decide to return to work. While some women decide other options that include the possibility of nurturing offspring only, some women have no choice. Men have the smallest leave time in Nigeria irrespective of the International Labour Organisation (ILO) law that allows for paternity leave to be an employee’s right.
ILO states ‘A statutory right to paternity leave is found in 78 countries. Leave is paid in 70 of these, underlining the trend of greater involvement of fathers around childbirth. Only 5 countries, all among the Developed Economies (Finland, Iceland, Lithuania, Portugal and Slovenia) provide paternity leave of more than two weeks’
In Nigeria, I am looking to discover how many organisations and men in those organisations, take the paternity leave and do what is required with the leave – which is to nurture. Nonetheless, I have heard stories of some men who take this paternity leave very seriously, who become absolutely nurturing and very strong support systems in their households. I applaud these men. However, while these men show examples of possible fluidity in gender roles, the numbers and evidence is not enough to cause a shift in societal norms and expectations on unpaid care..,not yet!
Current realities of empowering women require a lens into interrogating work that is not paid which mostly occurs in the household. Women are socialised to be ‘home makers’ with the backing of some religious Christian tenets. How many women see the domestic work done in homes by them as “unpaid” care work? Does society acknowledge the impact of nurture and domestication on women and girls brought upon by socialisation? Probably not! Society does not yet acknowledge the cost, time and attention that domestic work and care in the household has on women. This adverse effect is rippling and touches facets of women’s lives. The intersection of unpaid care and women breaking glass ceiling is worth a conversation, in my opinion.
The one shift that can begin to occur is when systems and structures see the gendered nurture roles and confront the dynamics and influence on all genders. A system can decide to be inclusive by making changes that benefit everyone no matter the decision they take on nurturing. Unpaid work that is socially assigned to one gender, can also be re-negotiated for the benefit of all gender.
Añuli Aniebo