Human beings are social creatures therefore we do not exist in isolation. Daily we interact and seek the opinion of others directly or indirectly.
Validation refers to seeking approval or opinion from others on a particular idea or when taking a decision. At some point in our lives, we have sort for this. For instance, when deciding which course to study, should I work for this organization and many others.
It is important to note that seeking validation is not bad however when you depend on the validation of others before you can take any decision, this becomes a major problem. With this, you empower such individuals to influence your life and this may have a negative impact on you.
Constantly seeking approval of others leads;
1. Unfulfilled Life: Although validation can help one in modifying your plans, visions, or goals as the case may be. However, when we become dependent on other people’s opinions on how we should live our lives, we tend to lose track of where we are headed for thereby living solely to please others thus making our lives boring and unfulfilled.
2. Depression and anxiety: Since we require the approval of others in order to live our best life, we become anxious about what their opinions will be and this makes us be less productive and we become depressed as we often feel that we have not met up with the standards others have created for us.
3. Loss of Personal Drive: Always seeking for validation of others leads to loss of personal drive to pursue your goals. We are constrained to live out the goal or dream set for us by others. The personal conviction that we once had is lost as a result of trying to please others. This in turn causes us to attract negative energy around us.
4. Destruction of Self-worth: Your opinion of yourself is watered down as you now rely solely on what other think of you. Validation affects your esteem negatively hence, making you vulnerable to their validators. We, therefore, put ourselves under unnecessary pressure just to please others thus stripping us of the power to make decisions ourselves.
Self-love, belief in oneself, and self-acceptance are the major tool against seeking constant approval of others. We must come to terms with the fact that we have in us all that is required for us to succeed and live a fulfilled life. Our lives can not and should not be lived on the basis of the standards set by others for us. This only limits us and makes our lives boring in the long run https://heir.com.ng/self-love-4-steps-in-achieving-true-self-acceptance/